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the sad story of a fangirl
I woke up knowing that something was wrong. I didn’t know what. I was panting, and sweaty all over, my eyes were wide open and dark bags hung under my eyes. I felt butterflies in my stomach, and my hand practically shook as I tried to drink my morning coffee, almost causing it to spill over the edge of my cup.
I had believed it to be the cause of a very bad nightmare, and I shook the feeling off. I soon forgot all about my uneasiness.
“Good morning, Seraph.” I kissed the poster which hung over my bed. As I finished my coffee, I stared into the deep blue eyes which stared back at me from the poster. Seraph was the singer of the band ‘Blackbirds,’ and I simply adored him and his music. I listened to him everyday on my ipod, and his posters hung all over my room. I had seen him live many times, and I had almost fainted when I got an autograph from him. He was my idol.
Today was going to be a good day. I would go and see him live again this evening. I got tingles of excitement just thinking of seeing him again. Oh, how he made my heart beat fast! His deep voice echoing through the halls of my mind. He had me hypnotized.
I got dressed into my outfit, which consisted of black jeans, a black and white checkered shirt, and a chain necklace. My wrists were covered in rainbow colored bracelets, and my lips were panted black. My make-up made me look pale, and the dark circles under my eyes seemed even darker, and I looked as if I hadn’t slept in days.
I happily walked out of my house down to the doughnut shop to get breakfast. I got a glazed doughnut and some more coffee. As I happily gulped down my doughnut, I saw my friends walk into the doughnut shop. They were happily chatting away, as if they didn’t have a care in the world, and then they saw me. They stopped in their tracks, and their chatter came to a stop. They looked at each other and at me, and whispered quietly.
“What?” I looked at them suspiciously. “Is there something wrong with me?” My friend Hazel looked at me for a long time. I saw pity in her eyes, and it made me uncomfortable. “What?” I repeated my question.
“Did you hear?” My other friend, Niki, said quietly, almost as if she didn’t want me to hear.
“What about him?” I started to get uneasy, and sweat rolled down my neck. I remembered how I had felt that morning.
“Did you know that... he got in an accident last night?” Niki’s voice cracked as she told me the news. I froze. I felt as if my heart had stopped.
“An accident? What happened to him?” Something in me told me that I didn’t want to know.
“He got into a car accident, and he... died.” My mind went blank. Seraph? Dead? It couldn’t be! It shouldn’t be! I was going to see his concert tonight, I was going to get him to give me another autograph... Dead? Seraph? No! I was so shocked that I didn’t notice that my mascara was dripping down my face.
“No...” my voice was quiet at first. “No...” My voice got louder. “NOOO!!!!!” I screamed, and all the other customers in the doughnut shop turned their heads to look at me. I ran out of the doughnut shop, leaving my unfinished doughnut just lying on the table. I ran to my house, into my room, and fell on my bed, crying. I lay there for a long time, my mascara dripping onto my sheets, but they were black already so no stain was left.
I don’t know how long I lay there, weeping, but soon I had wept the last tear. No, I told myself, Seraph is not dead, he’s not, he’s not, he’s NOT!!! He’s alive, I’ll see him at the concert tonight, I will. Soon I had convinced myself that he really wasn’t dead.
That evening, I arrived at the place where the concert would have taken place. I sat there, waiting for Seraph and his band to arrive. When he didn’t, I convinced myself that he was already onstage, singing for me. I screamed, cheering Seraph on, telling him that I loved him. I started to sing along with him, and dancing to the tune which played itself from memory in my head.
Some people walking by stared at me weirdly, and when a girl asked ‘what’s she doing, Mommy?’, her mother shushed her. Soon some men came and took me away from the concert. I screamed and bit them, telling them that the concert wasn’t over yet, that I hadn’t gotten Seraph’s autograph...